Google Docs Presentations

I just noticed google docs has a ‘create new presentation’.

  • Layouts
  • Themes
  • Full screen using F11 in firefox.
  • I like Sparkling and Shelly themes.
  • most impressive, give the presentation across the interweb.

Making your own theme

You can upload an image, set it as background, add text above it and use ‘duplicate slide’

Uploading existing powerpoint or open office presentations

This might be useful to upload something you use today, and it should carry forward all your themes. I must try this.

All in all I would say this is everything you need from a presentation software. It certainly beats PowerPoint at the ease in which you can invite people to watch a presentation with you.

Wins on ‘features you need’.

Great! (Plus no more annoying sounds and transitions!!!)

More people use Mac OSX than Vista

Vista has been out for more than a YEAR.

OSX has more users. Now, if < XP people decide that OSX is a better upgrade, that would be nice.

Future of Search

Scoble loves to expound the benefits of all the shit storm of time wasting websites. linkedin-jaiku-facebook-myspace-mahawtf-bbq-twitter. The very paradigm that they shift hasn’t even been commented on (in fact, they are all merely heavy fat context TAGS on what would be sane MEEBO conversations.

Search

  1. Type ‘badger’ in google.com
  2. Type ‘badger’ in ratemybadger.com
  3. Type ‘badger’ on some.book.mar.kin.gsit.e
  4. Type ‘badger’ on flickr.com

Now, I just pulled together ways of searching without context. Let’s do it again

  1. badgers on buybadger.com
  2. badgers on buymammals.com
  3. badgers on buystuff.com
  4. badgers on froogle.com

What we see here is specialisation. A badger only site, perhaps, which searches one site. This site might not even specialise in badgers, but the point is, one site, one price, one delivery / stock level.

buymammals.com might show badgers from various badger specialist or badger resellers. buystuff.com might show results from buymammals.com and buybadgers.com and buy lesbianalbinobadgers.com (rated #1932 in Alexa, because badger surfers use IE FTW!).

badgers on froogle.com might show results from 100-badger-sex-wholesale-cailis.spammer.com, but might also show results from buybadger, buy mammals, buystuff and lesbianalbinobadgers.com.

Fat Fuck (Watermelons….. mmmm)

The man-tits of tech himself balks at letting technology help you search, and likes to reinvent the wheel and call it web2.0 and proclaim that social bookmarking (oops! that is so web.147.alpha.pre.nightly.build) saves the day.

We can stack search, slice it, narrow it. Hey, add some semantics, we can shape it into a ripe watermelon, warm it up a bit, cut a hole in it and have our dirty little way with it.

How do I search? Well, let’s look

Google. Google alerts, some.soc.ia.l site, google site:digg.com badgers, stumble, asking people.

Recently, I use social bookmarks to find recommended sites. and digg.com, and stumble. And asking people. Recommendations, along with the ability to build and rely on ‘trust’ statistics of others, let’s us have confidence in results.

But! Lookout humans, attack of the robots!

I am sick of linkfucking little blogger shits creating the second wave of google fucks. Namely, hacking sitemaps, removing dates from blog posts, and generally giving google the impression that their 5 year old diatribe on domestic badger dancing rituals is important to me. Maybe it is, but fuck if I will admit it. ‘Bloggers’ in their ‘deathstart’ ‘blogosphere’are continually trying (as one sentient mass) to subvert the googles.

BUT. Google alerts are the best thing since that scene in Wild Things where you pray they will both get their tits out. You can search for something today, and let google send you little emails when it finds it. I like to think that google uses cheap child labor to scour pages of results, looking for new pages, and then typing each email to me manually, that it why I have 20 active google alerts neatly filtering into my gmail.

Unfortunately its all automated, or at least that is what they are sticking with.

Search isn’t being defined by the new shitstorm / wave of hyperactive little petulant webapps, but the apps are starting to unlock the very founding principles of the web circa 1998. Digg.com hasn’t done this yet!

Shock and AWE

Surprisingly as agile as existing web development is, digg.com is a prime example that you still need a basic grasp of development fundamentals.  It seems that a lightweight foundation can have bite-your-ass consequences later, as the 4 months of comment and search turmoil attests to.

Removing ‘ping’ links from Firefox 3.0

How to remove the support for ‘ping’ WHATWG specification crap.

1) Type  about:config in the url, hit enter

2) Click ‘omg stfu’ on the warning that appears (I’ll be careful, promise)

3) type browser.send_pings  in the search filter, at the top. It says true

4) double click the true value, it will say false.

Also, on reddit was a link to a ‘default redirect’ page if a site doesn’t want to support Firefox. (because of adblocker concerns).

Just a) never visit that site again, ever, b) set your browser agent to ‘pwnt’.

FireFox 3.0 to ‘pass’ Acid2 Test finally?

FireFox 3.0 prealpha 8 Acid TestI just slapped in Firefox 3.0a8pre, after a couple of crashes on startup, it got up and running in safe mode. I went to Acid2 test, and lo and behold, just a tiny, tiny bit off:

erp! minefield aka firefox 3 alpha – doesn’t seem to like file uploading. or maybe wordpress is still glitchy. Anyway.

update: yey. fileness. flashy.

More Bush Vanity Fodder – Rove Resignation Mere Hypeads.

“I’ve seen a man of far-sighted courage put America on a war footing and protect us against a brutal enemy in a dangerous conflict that will shape this new century,” Rove said. “I’ve seen a leader respond to an economy weakened by recession, corporate scandal and terrorist attacks by taking decisive action to strengthen the economy and create jobs.”

Once upon a dreary day, the gray cells of Bush’s advisers were working. Ol’ Georgie boy himself was catatonic in his usual state of alertness, smiling a half smile, allowing his head to bob around foolishly.

Not that Bush was overly aware, but the topic of this meeting was how to draw more media attention to praise on Bush’s stint as a ‘pwesidentie’, as Bush likes to call himself.

Merely having random quotes wasn’t working, they needed a scandalous envelope, get the media attention, and delivery a sinisterly crafted appraisal of Bushes blood soaked joy ride of office.

Letting his buddy go on holiday early and take a nice backhand of cash was easy.  People were waiting for some scandal, they left the reasons abiguous.

In a media baited announcement the co-conspirator delivered his speech:

“OMG I LOVE BUSH!”

So, media. You were had.

Leaving to spend more time with family? Try: Leaving to boost popular post-office rhetoric, and flavor the language for describing Bush’s stint. After he goes, it is all final, and you know the criticism can be heaped on without a chance of changing the results of his actions.

See more of this damage control in the future. See Bush walk onto the stage in a leather jacket to rock music. Then shoot the fucker in the head.

Michelle Madigan, stupid bitch, pwned at DEFCON

Michelle MadiganSo, I just got back from a pleasant evening to get a belly full of laughs from the Michelle Madigan is a stupid bitch story. Here is a simulated excerpt from the pre-DEFCON warm up:

Michelle Madigan: I’m a big girl now, I can’t write for shit, so I will wear a neato pin-ho camera and talk to these geek guys and try and be feminine and get them to brag to me about their felonies, and then I will be famous! Sho’ it’s unethical, and will probably end my career by showing everyone what a complete stupid bitch I am, but hey, I might get my whoring 15 minutes!

Lol! Michelle Madigan is official stupid whore of the month. Look at that picture. I am not quite feminine and pretty, but by jimny, I know there are desperate guys out there who will fuel my ego! I just know she owns more than 20 different colored felt tip pens, and marks her ‘reading material’ with them, and draws neat little diagrams.

No doubt she will paint herself as a victim here, and try and stretch this out to her advantage. Advice? Forget her, let her fade real quick and work at a supermarket.

She was so pwned, and in the best way. Lying, cheating, micheveous little trout of a whore she is.

The moral of the story? Don’t screw around with people who are smarter than you. I guess Dateline NBC hasn’t learned this lesson. µ

She sure is fugly. And stupid. Here is a prize winner:

Michelle Madigan Txtin Fur Helpz

Take your own copy of the shot, and Photoshop it yourself!! have fun! Send your ultra-memetic version to print.wordpress.com@gmail.com – a free feel good virtual pat on the back for every entry! while stocks last!

Michelle Madigan

George Bush – Worst President in History (of any country)

From the last article I linked:

Lieberman’s comments echo those by Rush Limbaugh, who in May said, “Long after we’re all dead and gone, when historians who are not yet born begin to write about this era, they’re going to place George Bush in the upper echelon of presidents who had a great vision for America, who looked beyond our shores, who didn’t just restrict himself to domestic policy niceties.”

It’s interesting that now, with the war more unpopular than ever and violence skyrocketing, Lieberman decides Bush is a great president. In contrast, in May 2003, when Lieberman was competing for the Democratic nomination for president, he said the Bush administration “seems to have been unprepared for the quick victory it predicted.” Similarly, in Sept. 2003, Lieberman stated:

I am shocked at how unprepared the Bush administration was for what to do afterward. They’ve left a vacuum which the terrorists, the Saddam loyalists, our enemies, have jumped into.

Rush and Lieberman may not be aware, but historians are already debating Bush’s legacy. In fact, Rolling Stone recently wrote, “Many historians are now wondering whether Bush, in fact, will be remembered as the very worst president in all of American history.”

Go Rolling Stone, from linked article:

George Bush Worst President in HistoryGeorge W. Bush’s presidency appears headed for colossal historical disgrace. Barring a cataclysmic event on the order of the terrorist attacks of September 11th, after which the public might rally around the White House once again, there seems to be little the administration can do to avoid being ranked on the lowest tier of U.S. presidents. And that may be the best-case scenario. Many historians are now wondering whether Bush, in fact, will be remembered as the very worst president in all of American history.

So that is how George Bush will be remembered, I guess even despite his best efforts. Interestingly this will be a good test of the ministry of truth effect as I deeply suspect that bush will indeed attempt to cover up this as:

  1. he has gotten people to say he isn’t a moron
  2. he has gotten google to remove the google bomb
  3. he had the whitehouse website rerouted to break all web links to his bio
  4. he has Lieberhan and Limbaugh start to say he will be remembered greatly, in spite of the overwhelming evidence to the contrary. Unless historians get real stupid real fast, the amount of damning evidence that will be linked to opinion on Bush will be conclusive.

So, don’t forget, let history forever remember what a fucking asshole George Bush was.

George Bush – Lest we forget he is a moron, and a greed fuelled war mongerer

My last post about the retarded currently enjoying a job as president of the US concerned itself with the fact that people have started popping out of the wood-work saying that George Bush isn’t a moron (he is). I said Bush was trying to set something for his historic record.

They even got google to remove the google bombs. Fuck.

And now this.

Bush is getting people to lay a foundation for him to pay his way into the history books as Mr Nice Guy. You know, living the next 5 years that he is going to live out of office will suck if people just jeer at you all the time.

George Bush will be dead in five years.

I love writing that shit, thinking that somewhere across the water some graduate prick at a computer, on some shitty RSS client software that the US government paid 66 million USD for, because it lets them haxor the internets, will google, find it, and then go all cold with sweat and put some ‘RSS tap’ on me. Then $1000 USD in tax payers money a day will go into analysing this executive editorial column.

keywords: outside, thanks, friend, dog high moon, system go. jump jump pogo bullfrog says hi.

That wasn’t a coded terrorist block that had a secret hidden meaning. Or maybe it was.

I should stop reading Tom Clancy novels. That and strapping C4 to myself on the bus, and thumbing the detonator switch idly, one day I might slip.

Muslim Franchisee to sue over Dunkin Donuts Pork Policy

So, here are all 4 angles on this story:

  1. Signed up prior to meat products being sold
  2. When they were sold, for 20 years was allowed to sell without these meat product
  3. Was given a sign that said ‘meat products not available’
  4. He is a franchisee, this isn’t his brand or product range

So, you either say ‘a franchise can do what it likes! You can’t use your religious beliefs to discriminate against the people who want to buy meat products!’ or you say ‘If you open a franchise you agree to play by their rules.

But, it is more complicated than that.

It is unreasonable for Dunkin’ Donuts to enforce the brand and product line management across all their stores? They make the food, they do the marketing. The owner has benefited somewhat from the rise of Dunkin’ Donuts, and now refuses to adhere to their own interests and beliefs for the food product line.

Is there a limit to what can be construed as grounds for discrimination based on religious beliefs? It isn’t why he is refusing to sell these products, it is the very fact that he is refusing to sell these products.

Let me give your addled brains a breather, I know all this PC writing is making you reach for the nearest life-affirming forum of users to dictate your own liberal thinking ways:

Imagine this person was a vegetarian. They decide to run a franchise but refuse to start selling meat products. Is it reasonable that a international chain should have its product line and policies dictated by the existing whims and desires, beliefs or business accument of its store managers, or that of the people they are serving?

Is there ever a fair reason not to sell a product when you are a franchisee?

Let’s say it costs a lot to stock, and you don’t make much of a margin, or perhaps it is being advertised as on special, and you don’t want to participate in selling low margin menu items. Franchises do give some leeway on this, but should they allow you to freely pick and choose any item based on margins?

What about basing your stocking philosophy on how readily identifiable the food is to color blind people? Dunkin’ Donuts make a lovely range of various colorful things. Imagine someones disdain at those icing / sprinkle combinations that aren’t appealing for those with protanopia, deuteranopia or tritanopia.

What if you are a McDonalds franchisee owner, and you suddenly decide you aren’t going to sponsor industrial farming, aside from being managerial suicide (can I have a … mcveggie please…) is it right for McDonalds to decide that franchisee owners are not allowed to boycott the very products they sell?

Regardless of reason (let’s be sane and imagine all products being sold are legal), is it ever allowable for a franchisee to boycott a product?

Is a religious belief stronger than a life choice not to eat meat? Does the fiscal logic of not stocking low margin items win over the franchisees marketing dollar?

Although the playing field changed for this franchisee owner, the very nature of a franchise is not something to be sniffed at. In fact, it is a lot like taking on a new nationality. By accepting the terms and conditions of the franchise, wouldn’t it be sane if countries has their own Ts&Cs? I guess things like constitution are similar, or is this a complete dystopian idea?

Many xenophobics amongst the world would love the idea of rationalizing their nationality and define it by everything they don’t like about immigrants to that geographical location. But then that is why the freedoms in the US are no longer freedoms.

How to conclude this?

Well, you can argue that the franchise has a right to market and maintain a product line, and no whim is stronger than the other as an excuse to not fulfill that obligation.

You can also say that there is a limit to the amount of change that a franchisee can accept during the life of the agreement.

Then, you can argue that, as a food establishment, serving meat is an entirely acceptable and economically necessity in moving the chain forward. Could you argue the other way that franchisees should be allowed to derail overall profitability of a company for their own interests?

The underlying question i: who gets to decide what food is sold. The question that everyone will focus on will be:

Should all companies adhere to guidelines of social and religious awareness, and provide facilities, marketing and products that cater for gay, bi, undecided, trans, hydrogenated, straight, upside down or goth people.

This isn’t a question about religion versus economics, or personal rights, or discrimination. Are there ever reasons why someone can selectively choose to stock items? If yes, can anyone selectively stock items regardless of any pre-existing definable reason for doing so?

This is one step from nullifying all rules from a franchise, or indeed, forcing them to write these rules in more and more truly discriminating terms.

Freedom of religion does not require other people, groups, or companies to accomidate you.

and

I’d have been a bit more skeptical of this suit, had it not been that Dunkin’ Donuts allowed him to not sell the meat for 20 years. In that case, the fact that they are suddenly jumping on his back after helping him not sell pork, I think gives him plenty of reason to sue and defend his shop.

The above accepts the reasoning as valid, as well as implying that ’selling meat’ is a big enough of a deal. Will we have to sign religious exemption and tolerance clauses in business? In this case, despite the time span given, I think not.  I am sure the plaintiff will argue that Dunkin’ Donuts were AWARE of this impending issue – and then argue that they should be aware of it.

I don’t get this shit. You don’t want to handle pork? Don’t buy a franchise of a restaurant that sells fucking pork. Open your own damn restaurant. Dunkin Donuts owns the name and they are the suppliers, he has to comply.

He wasn’t discriminated against, he signed a contract and accepted it’s terms. They simply don’t have to renew his franchise agreement if he won’t respect it. This isn’t a public affair, it’s a private business. Property rights FTW.

I absolutely hate these ridiculous lawsuits. You simply don’t have rights on other people’s property. He doesn’t own dunkin donuts in any way, he has no right to anything that is owned by dunkin donuts.

.